Don't bullshit, let's get laid and burn calories!

Cheated on his wife with the first woman he met and regretted it

Fucking hell, you jumped in the pool! Now jump on your dick

The lights are out, but we won't sit idly by, we'll rather fuck

Aren't you ashamed of yourself? You're jerking off, and your girlfriend is so unfucked

Blew the guy's mind on the first day of self-isolation, but at least she sucked

No, honey, you're not going to work dressed like that — only to fuck off

"Jump on my dick, and then I'll help you with your quest in The Witcher."

I'm so tired of not getting hit on by a guy that I'm going to take the initiative myself

Did you think Lolly Lips was always getting laid in real life?

Honey, let's fuck! You don't want to? At least let me jerk off with my tits

Neighbor, what's all the fuss about? My pipes don't leak, check for yourself

You're so fucked up — you'd better shut your mouth with your dick and moan

Sucking courses are good, but you need practice. Suck it, honey

Are you jerking off? Don't be selfish, I'll take off my skirt and sit on my dick, we'll both come

You can't say no to sex with a shape like that, so I always do

Every time I pick up a T-shirt, all the issues resolve themselves

Gave an old iPhone as a Christmas present and had to suck it up like a new one

Picked up a hottie from an unloved job and got sex in gratitude

Do you want coffee or my pussy? No, you can't have it all at once

It doesn't matter if it's the third one or not, fuck me to a convulsive orgasm

Give me a blowjob, huh? You're cute and your breasts are nice, I got a boner

Hillbilly slut agreed to have sex for only $1

Didn't let me play The Witcher — took the keyboard and sat on top of it